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A Noble Warrior is one who understands that he is in daily spiritual warfare with the evil of this world. Yet he is also a man who truly loves God and seeks to model a life of compassion, integrity, and servant leadership in family, church and community. Prayerfully consider how you can encourage yourself and others to engage in our growth path of Worship, Word, and World in order to ...make disciples and release them for service in our broken world.

 

Text of Don's Message:

Showed the DVD “TOGETHER/Team Hoyt”

I’ve seen that video over 25 times and it still pulls at my heart strings. I hope it touched you this morning. We’re talking about Noble Warriors, and we just saw a very powerful example of what it means to be a physical father. My goal today is to encourage and challenge all the men here to be noble warriors, to be both spiritual and physical fathers as God blesses you in your life circumstances and directs you to other opportunities to serve Him.

Let’s pray for just a moment. Father, it is a joy to be in Your house this morning. It is a joy to gather together and lift our hearts to you. Father, may the words of my mouth and the meditations of our hearts be acceptable to you, O Lord, our Rock and our Redeemer. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Yes, I’m going to be talking to men primarily this morning, but I want to say a word to the women here. I fully believe, and I’ve done this in a number of places around the country, that even though I’m speaking to men, you, as women, will get it. You will make all the little connections. Don’t ask me how it happens, I just know that it does. So, I’ll be speaking to men, but you’ll pull things out of here that will apply to you. I know that, and so I encourage you to do that as we go through our time this morning. A note to men as well, I’m speaking to all men, because the principal message is that we need to be spiritual fathers. And you can be a spiritual father to anyone. So you’ll hear me talking about husbands and fathers in a physical sense, but I’m talking to all men. I challenge you as men, if you’re not in that circumstance of being a husband or a father today, that you don’t turn me off. This message is for you as well. It is for all men.

When you think of a man who is noble, what comes to mind? Maybe it is something like a man of honor, of high moral character, of strong principles, of humble spirit. When you think of a warrior, what comes to mind? Maybe something like a man who is well trained and well equipped and ready for, or maybe even already engaged, in battle. Let me share my definition of a noble warrior. A noble warrior is a man who truly loves and serves God and seeks to live out a life of compassion, honor, integrity and servant leadership in relationships with wife, family, church, and community while understanding that he’s involved in daily spiritual warfare.

John Eldridge in his popular book, Wild at Heart, in fact for three or four years, that book was the No. 1 book used in men’s Bible studies across our country—and he offered his belief that men look for three things in life: a battle to fight, a beauty to win, an adventure to live. Well, I think Dick Hoyt in our video gave us a great example of what that means in being a physical father. Let me tell you how I gleaned that from this video.

What was the battle that Dick fought? It was to give his son some sense of a productive life. And that was a major battle with Rick, who is profoundly challenged, can’t speak, can’t walk. What was the beauty that he sought to win? It was giving Rick life, to see him live. Did you catch the point in the video when it said for the first time in his life, when his dad ran for him, he felt like he wasn’t handicapped? Dick was able to give him a sense of life. What could be more beautiful than that? What was the adventure that Dick lived? It was simply the opportunity to run, swim and bike with his son, including a trek across 3,700 miles. And did you see that part of the video where he was actually in a harness pulling his son in a raft as part of a triathlon? Do you understand what’s involved in that—three miles of swimming, a marathon to run, a marathon to bike? I wouldn’t even attempt to do that. It was a battle, but he does it because it gives him the opportunity to battle on behalf of his son, to give beauty to his son’s life and to live an adventure.

Well, let’s try to put that into a spiritual context. The battle we as men need to fight is for Jesus Christ and against sin and evil. The beauty to win are the hearts and souls God entrusts to us: our wives, our children and others that he puts into our life, to be spiritual fathers and spiritual grandfathers. The adventure to live is contained in the legacy that we leave. As disciples of Jesus Christ, who have we and who are we discipling to the point that they choose to become Christ followers, and then they in turn can disciple others? How have we impacted the generations? That is one of the challenges.

In our study of Ephesians over the last few weeks, we’ve dealt with three elements of how we are to conduct ourselves as men. I’m going to turn to Ephesians just very briefly and highlight those for us. Turn with me to Ephesians 5. Ephesians 5:1 says, “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” So, number 1, we are to be imitators. Number 2, verse 21 of the same chapter, Ephesians 5:21, very simply, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” And then last week, Glenn gave us an introduction into Ephesians 5:25, which says this: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word.” And I’d like to add one more today. Turn over to Ephesians 6:4, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children. Instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”

To me, these speak to the centrality of relationships. We’re going to take a look at the critical nature of relationships as we as men seek to be noble warriors on His behalf. I think many of the issues that we face today are the result of not building significant relationships, not being a part of the church body and community. But before we talk about these other relationships, we must deal with making sure we understand something very important: the sin of Adam.

The sin of Adam was abdication. And ever since Adam, men have done a good job of abdicating responsibility. I would say one of the biggest challenges is not to abdicate in relationships. You see, many of us as men have gotten to a point where we are so relationally dysfunctional that we’ve convinced ourselves that we don’t need to be in relationship, that we can be an island unto ourselves. To which I say: bunk! And here’s the reason why: Who made us? Obviously, God made us. What did He make us for? To be in relationship with Him for His honor and glory. And what’s the opportunity that we have as a result of our nature which is in the image of God? The fact that we’re to be imitators of God, doesn’t that require us and enable us to be in relationship with Him? We are fundamentally, men, relational beings.

So, from this point on, I don’t want to hear anything about any of us going fishing for a whole day, and when we come home to our wives, and they ask us, “So, what did you talk about?” You have to confess you said nine or ten words the entire day. And, those nine or ten words consisted of, “that was a nice cast,” or, “oops, that’s the one that got away.” That isn’t relationship, as much as we’d like to think it is. Oh, we went shoulder to shoulder, and we were good buds. No, relationship is something more than that. Let’s talk about this.

The first and primary relationship is our relationship with God. This is a Christian man’s first great battle. It’s one thing to know God; it’s another thing to know God. Scripture tells us in Deuteronomy 6, in Matthew 22, and many other places that we’re to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, with all of our soul, with all of our strength, with all of our mind. That’s telling us repeatedly that we’re to love God with all that we are.

Second, in Proverbs 3:5, 6, it says that we’re to trust in the Lord with all our heart, lean not on our own understanding, in all of our ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct our paths. We’re supposed to trust in the Lord.

Third, in 1 Thessalonians 5:17, it says we are to talk to God. In fact, we are to pray without ceasing. Men, we are to love the Lord with all of ourselves, we are to trust Him and we are to talk to Him. We’re to pray without ceasing. Remember this as you do that: Your manhood is not defined by what you do or what you have. Your manhood is defined only by who you are. You are created in the image of God. His Holy Spirit indwells you. That is who you are. It has nothing to do with what you do and what you have. It is who you are as a man of God.

The second great battleground for men is for the hearts and souls of wives and children. Let’s talk about that for a minute. Ephesians 5:25, as we read earlier, tells us to love your wife as Christ loves the church and gave Himself for her. There are many ways we can show that we love our wives. We ought to tell her consistently that we love her. We ought to show her that. In fact, if you have kids, show that in front of your kids. I hope you do that. They go, “Yuk.” They don’t mean “yuk.” They enjoy seeing that kind of love expressed in front of them. They need to see that kind of love expressed in front of them. And, oh yes, you might even need to go to the mall with your wife, if you really love her. Now if that’s really traumatic, maybe you can negotiate something else, but carefully, carefully.

As far as relationships with wives, I want to discuss three specific things. First, to strive for dying-to-self love. I’m going to describe this in three aspects. The first is praying love. Men, you need to pray continually for your wife. You need to be doing spiritual warfare on behalf of your wife. Pray continually for your wife. Second, attentive love. Lavish time and care on your wife. Third, faith love, a love that extends even to death. That’s what we said we would do when we said our wedding vows. We need to do that. My father is a tremendous example to me of that kind of love. A few of you may have met my folks when they were in the service a couple of weeks ago. They were here on their way for a ten-day bed and breakfast tour of Kentucky and Tennessee. They saw about a dozen Civil War sites. They visited Lookout Mountain. They went to Lincoln’s birthplace. My mom has severe osteoarthritis. If you understand what that disease is about when it gets to a severe level, it basically drains all the strength out of the limbs. My mom cannot pick up pots and pans for cooking at home anymore. My mom cannot walk up and down steps. My dad wraps his arm around her and basically lifts her up steps. And they stayed in some bed and breakfasts with very narrow and winding stairs. That’s okay. My dad does it because he has that kind of dying to self love to the point of death. He says to my mom, you took care of me all these years and I will take care of you. He does it out of an incredibly loving, giving heart and a respect him mightily for it.

Two, be the spiritual leader in your home, that’s what your wife wants from you. Ask her. If you haven’t, go home and ask her. She wants you to be the spiritual leader in your home. Oh, it also happens to be what God wants you to be, a spiritual leader in your home.

Three, understand that your first responsibility as a provider spiritually, physical is secondary. As you are having that conversation about being the spiritual leader in your home, if you are feeling really excited and pushing the boundaries, ask her if she wouldn’t be willing to give up stuff, ask her if she would be content in a smaller home, maybe not such nice cars, maybe less toys in the house whether that’s computers or 50 inch flat screen plasma 3D TV whatever it is where we get kind of blurry eyed sitting in front. Ask if she wouldn’t give that up for you being the spiritual leader in your home? Have that conversation with your wife, if you haven’t.

Three things, strive for dying for self love, being the spiritual leader in your home, understand your first responsibility, provide living water and read the word in your home, physical becomes second. Men, do not abdicate on this. The sin of Adam was abdication. Men do not abdicate. For many of us, this can be intimidating. We look at our wives and see women we feel more spiritual mature than we are. Figure it out, work together, support one another, but men lead. That is what your wives want. Oh, by the way it is what God wants as well. Bottom line, because of things you do positively in your relationship and leadership in your home with your wife. Is your wife more Christ-like because she married you? Let me ask that again, is your wife more Christ-like because she married you?

Fathers, love your children. Do not exasperate your children; bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Maybe an equal priority is the discipleship of your children. Be there spiritual father as well as their physical father. Lead them spiritually, do not abdicate on this. Spend time with your children. I would like for us to look very briefly at Psalm 127:4, 5 “Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies at the gate.” Let’s put this in context of when it was written. All of our arrows would have been hand made. We would have searched high and low for the perfect sapling to cut down to be the shaft of the arrow. We would have whittled it. We would have polished it to make it as smooth, round and as flawless as possible. Then, we would have looked for perfect feathers and tie to one end of the shaft. Then we would have looked for a stone that we could pound it to create the perfect arrow head to attach to the other end of the shaft. We have as close to a perfect arrow as we can get. That’s what we need to do with our children. We need to turn them and build them up to be the most perfect arrows that they can be with God’s help. Do not abdicate on this men. It is what God calls us to do. Oh, by the way, when the arrow gets sent out. To me that is representative of us making sure that we have built up our children to the point that when they go, they know exactly who they are in Christ. And they have a good idea of what God’s plan for them is and that they are equipped and ready to serve God with their whole heart. That is the challenge that we have in being the spiritual fathers of our children. Do not abdicate on this men.

I wrestle with this constantly myself. Star and I have three boys. One lives in Detroit, two live on the west coast. How do I continue to be a spiritual father for our sons? I praise God that I have really good relationships with our two married sons. Because it gives me the opportunity to engage in trying to help them understand what it means to be a spiritual husband and leader in their home. We also have the great joy of having two granddaughters, Haley McNeil was born Monday night west coast time, Tuesday 2:55 eastern time – 6 pounds 11 ounces, 21 inches long. Beautiful little girl. How do I be a spiritual father, grandfather of Every & Haley? With God’s help, I may find a way. But legacy is critically important. What is the legacy that I might have an opportunity to leave with my children and my grandchildren? The bottom line – are your children embracing their own faith or are they simply mimicking your faith? That is a huge issue. There was a study done a few years ago by George Barnum – a survey of 13 year olds. Of those who took the survey 84% of the 13 year olds in this country claimed that they are Christians. Barnum does an interesting thing, very often he goes back and resurveys and he does it on the basis of some basic Evangelical Christian tenets: Is Jesus the son of God? Is Jesus the only way to heaven? Is the Bible the true, inherent word of God? The things we would say are core to what we believe. When those same 13 year olds were resurveyed, 6% were Christians in that sense. You see the problem is there is incredible noise and incredible pressure out there. And there is an incredible pressure to actually take a posture that says “Oh, if that’s what you believe that’s okay”. But what happens is many, many cases our children begin to take some of those things and what they have is a view of Christianity that we do not understand. And so again, I can ask the bottom line question – Is your children’s faith their own or are they simply mimicking your faith?

Relationship with the church – men, we need to acknowledge that we are part of the body, the church. We need to acknowledge that we cannot do it alone. We need to be discipled as well as being disciple makers. We need to understand the value of having leadership and discipleship confirmed and reinforced by others. Another passage I would like to look at briefly is Deuteronomy 6:4-9 “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” Do you get the image? The image is that the word of God is always present. We are immersed in God’s Word and we are constantly talking about it and working out how it applies in our everyday life. There is another application of that passage as much as it is individually, think about it this way: If my children go over to your house and you are instructing them the same way I am instructing them what happens? What I teach is being reinforced by you and I am being validated as their father by you. What happens if I teach Sunday School at ZPC and your children come to my Sunday School class? What I am teaching them reinforces what you are teaching them at home. Here me well, we cannot do it alone. We weren’t meant to do it alone. We are meant to do it as a part of the body of Christ, reinforcing one another. Oh, by the way, the church is not supposed to lead in training our children. The church is here to support and reinforce what you do at home. Men, do not abdicate on this. It is a God given responsibility to be the spiritual leader, to be a noble warrior in your home.

Be a disciple; engage as a spiritual father in the church. I am speaking now to each and every one of you as men. You are the spiritual fathers of all the young men and all of the boys in this church. At this point, let me speak to the women. Women, you are the spiritual mothers of all the young women and all of the girls in this church. Let me say to men again because sometimes we need to hear it more than once, you are the spiritual fathers of all the young men and all of the boys in this church. Think about it. Don’t we say that when we baptize young ones here. Pastor X asks us to stand and we affirm that we are going to help the parents raise their little ones. What do I do when I walk out of this service? Do I follow through with that? That is a responsibility that I have to be take that seriously and men, do not abdicate on this. The application for me is spiritual legacy. The only sustainable legacy you can leave is an active faith in Jesus Christ in the life of others. The only sustainable legacy is an active faith in Jesus Christ in the life of others. Engage fully first in strengthening your own faith, then in the faith of your wife, then in the faith of your children, and then in the faith of others as God give you opportunity. And understand it is a spiritual battle, it is a spiritual battle, and we need to be capable of being noble warriors and fight the good fight. Be compassionate, be loving, be strong, be bold as a spiritual father. What if you choose not to engage in the battle? Only 6% of the children growing up in church remain in the church. A significant majority of the young men in prison and in gangs are there because their physical fathers were not in their lives. The divorce rate for Christians is the same as for non-Christians. What about faith, today? Those over 65, 65% are Christians. Now I am going to jump all the way to the Bridger generation, those who are 15-34. It is declining in precipitous percentages. The Bridgers, those 15-34, current estimates are around 4%. Men do not abdicate. What can you do? Let me give you some action steps. First, make sure you are growing spiritually. Commit to one to one discipleship and/or small group relationships. Engage faithfully in the world spiritually.

Second, work to be the spiritual leader in your family, commit to it. Pray consistently for your wife, children, and the others you have God given relationships with. Do spiritual battle on their behalf. Lead making sure your family has worship and devotion times. Again, men do not abdicate. I understand sometimes it is the wife who leads in this. Work together, figure it out. Men lead. Make sure you’re stating that it is important to do that, because it is. Be a disciple maker; engage in ministry in this church and outside the church. We have huge opportunities to engage. Right now we have needs in our nursery and children’s Sunday school. And I know our leaders would love to have more men involved. Commit to ZPC. Consider going to the upcoming inquirer’s class and consider church membership if you haven’t. On October 31 and November 7, two Sunday mornings, we will be having an inquirer’s class. I would encourage you to consider that. Bottom line - be a good steward, a godly steward of your time, talent, and treasures. Be lavish stewards of your time, talent, and treasures. God lavishes great gifts on us. Can we do anything else but lavish back to him. Be compassionate, be strong, be courageous, be a spiritual father and a noble warrior. Wives, what can you do? Be an encourager, walk along side your husbands, respect them, be a helpmate.

 Don’s message was followed by a personal testimony from Jim Pike who shared his experiences as a noble warrior and spiritual father discipling young men over the past ten years.