ZPCBlog

About this post: We want to stay connected! This blog post is part of a series of daily devotionals for this season. Read them, share them, and pray that they bring God's peace and love to our communities. To sign up to receive text notification of these posts, text ZPCDevo to 317.768.0600. We welcome your comments and questions each day. 

About the author: Jenni and her husband Scott have been ZPCers for  more than 13 years. They have a high school aged daughter, a son in middle school, and twin boys in elementary school. 

Today's Scripture: Psalm 94

“When I said, ‘My foot is slipping,’ your love, O LORD, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul.”     Psalm 94:17-18

I do not consider myself to be an overly anxious person or a worrier. I generally tend not to lose much sleep over things once I’ve prayed about them and talked myself through their worst-case scenarios. But, at the start of this COVID-19 “lockdown,” I found myself becoming anxious. I wasn’t so much worried about anyone in my home contracting this potentially-deadly virus; we had no pre-existing conditions, don’t fall into the “at risk” age bracket, and would likely make it through the virus itself unscathed. Rather than being anxious about the impact of the virus itself on our family, my thoughts—and anxieties—became focused on flattening the curve for the safety of others, “homeschooling” my four kids, and obtaining groceries for our family of six.

Now, I admit, “anxious” might not be the best way to describe my feelings about homeschooling. Perhaps a more accurate descriptor of my feelings would be “entirely opposed to,” because I’d learned shortly after having my first child that I’d rather have my toenails removed one by one than be a stay-at-home mom—let alone a homeschooling mom of four. (If I could hire someone to teach them all via Zoom for the duration of this quarantine, I’d gladly do it—any takers?) Even if it wasn’t causing the anxiety, let’s just say that my new job as “teacher” wasn’t doing anything to ease my COVID-19-induced angst.

The grocery situation, however? It was legitimately stressing me out. While our new shelter-in-place rules allowed us to leave home to obtain groceries, we were being also strongly encouraged to stay home—which meant scheduling our groceries for curbside pick-up or having them delivered. Early on, scheduling those pickups/deliveries was quite a feat—I’d spend an hours online throwing things in my cart only to find out upon checkout that the next available delivery/pickup slot was five days out and the grocery was actually out of 25% of the items I’d placed in my cart. My one actual trip into the grocery store to purchase things myself didn’t make me feel any better; some sections of the grocery were empty of food entirely, and while I’d found most of what I needed, I felt germy and uncomfortable the entire time I was there and for hours afterward. I soon found myself praying about groceries, sharing my grocery stress with my husband and friends, and actually losing sleep about groceries. What if I couldn’t get what I needed, and we actually (gasp!) ran out of milk or had to resort to using Kleenex as toilet paper? What if my 14 year-old son ate all the food before the next delivery or pick-up slot opened up??? As the psalmist says in 94:18, I found my feet slipping.

But something else began happening, too. As I reminded myself that God was in control and he wasn’t going to let my family starve (even if there was no ground beef or canned corn to be had at the grocery store, I could still have a restaurant meal delivered or picked up at the drop of a hat, for goodness’ sake!), I found myself becoming increasingly thankful and content.

Sure, this time has been stressful. But I’ve been overwhelmed by the blessings that have come as a result of our being locked down. For the first time in years, our evenings and weekends have not been consumed with kids’ sports. Carpool time has been replaced with board games and watching movies with our kids, trips to the neighborhood pond for fishing, long walks and bike rides, staying up late to watch Netflix with my husband, and dinners together every night. I’ve had extra time with my daughter, Emma, a senior in high school whose competitive dance schedule historically made it such that we only saw her one or two nights per week (oh, how I’m cherishing this extra time with her before she leaves us for college!). Pandemic-induced travel bans meant that I didn’t have to go on the “senior spring break” trip to Mexico that I’d been dreading. My older and younger kids have been PLAYING TOGETHER, and I haven’t had to wear makeup, dry my hair, or put on “real clothes” in over six weeks!

As part of my daily devotional time each morning, I’ve been journaling my prayer requests anxieties over the past several weeks. I’ve also been listing the blessings I’ve noticed as a result of this lockdown…and the joys far outweigh my anxieties. I’d even go so far as to say that the contentment and joy have quashed the anxieties.

My husband has told me on several occasions over the past few weeks, “Jenni, you’re the most content shelter-in-place person I’ve ever met,” and I’d say perhaps this is true, for “When anxiety was great within me, (His) consolation brought joy to my soul.”

ACTIVITY:

Journal or make a list of your anxieties and give them over to God in prayer. Make a similar list of all the blessings you’ve noticed over the past several weeks and praise God for them!

PRAYER:

Lord,
Thank you for supporting us in difficult times, when we feel we are slipping. Thank you for not only holding us steady in the midst of uncertainty, but going so far as to console us and bring us joy! We pray for all those who are suffering right now: those who have lost loved ones—whether due to COVID or other injury or illness; those who are sick; those who are alone due to a lack of visitors and those who want to visit their loved ones, but can’t; those who have lost jobs or significant income; and for those healthcare workers who are on the front lines caring for the sick. Lord, we pray that they feel your presence and that, through you, they are able to find joy in the midst of pain.
Amen

Share