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About this post: We want to stay connected! This blog post is part of a series of daily devotionals for this season. Read them, share them, and pray that they bring God's peace and love to our communities. To sign up to receive text notification of these posts, text zpc to 39970. We welcome your comments and questions each day. 

About The Author: Haley and her husband, Adam, have been members at ZPC for 2 years. They’re involved with Great Banquet and are part of a wonderful Home Group. 

Today's Scripture: Psalm 112

The last week in February, I changed my phone wallpaper to this verse. At the time, I was 35 weeks pregnant with our first child and nervous about all the “normal” life changes ahead. Do we have everything we need to bring a baby home? Have we learned everything? Would he be healthy? Would it be painful? When will he arrive? And how?! 

As you can probably tell, I can be an anxious person. I figured a constant daily reminder that *I am not in control* was perfect.

A few days later, on February 28th, little Liam stopped moving in utero. After a call to the doctor, we rushed to the hospital (no bags packed)... the Doctor on-call told us “it doesn’t look good, if he doesn’t move for us in the next 20 minutes, we will need to go forward with delivering.” My mind went racing. This can’t be happening. My parents were still in Florida for the winter, Adam’s we’re out of town, the doctor on-call wasn’t the doctor I had seen during my whole pregnancy, and even though my wonderful husband sat by my side, I felt scared and alone. I didn’t know what else to do - so, I called my mom and prayed. At this point, I had to TRUST that this was the plan all along. I wasn’t alone. God has me and my son in his arms. He is in control. Not me. 

Around an hour later, Liam was born. I only got to see him for 10 seconds before they took him to the NICU. We wouldn’t see each other again until the next day since I delivered via C-section. Since I couldn’t be with him on his first night, I had to trust in God to take care of him. God made each of the wonderful and intelligent doctors and nurses that cared for our little Liam on his first night. I couldn’t be there, but God was. He always is.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that there would be many more nights like this. Nights where Adam and I would leave the NICU, and then leave the hospital without Liam. Even though the staff was amazing, it was difficult to trust he was in good hands. It was difficult to see other couples leaving the hospital carrying their newborn baby in a car seat, and to wonder when our turn would be. It was difficult that the way I pictured it to be, was so FAR different from reality.

I cried. But, we trusted and we prayed. We were blessed to have other people praying for us near and far – some bringing us food, friends gifted us premie clothes (hadn’t planned for a 5lb baby!), and some just sent encouraging texts/emails. All of these gestures were a gift from God. He was taking care of us each step of the way through the gift of his people. 

*I’d like to especially thank each of you, ZPC family, for the support you’ve given us! The prayers, phone calls, texts, and cards made us feel so blessed to be part of this church body.

It was a long journey of transfusions, blood draws, meetings with doctors and specialists, waiting on answers, and praying to be home soon with a healthy little boy. After 4 weeks, 29 bittersweet days, we were able to bring Liam home on my original due date! When you trust, God delivers. He is so good.

I find this verse so applicable to not only our lives the past couple months but also the current situation with COVID-19. We may not understand it all, it may have altered our plans, it may leave us feeling fearful and anxious, but despite all of that - WE. MUST. TRUST. We can trust in the promise that God will take care of us. Wherever this virus takes us, we’re not alone. No matter how long or quick the journey is, he will carry us through. This is the only thing that brings me peace at a time like this. 

I have hope because I trust God knows what’s best for us, even if it looks VERY different than what we may have planned. 

Activity: 

Write down 3 things that bring you anxiety or fear currently that are outside of your control. Then, in a different color marker, cross each one off and write in large letters “trust God.” Hang this somewhere you can see it each day (on your fridge, bathroom mirror, etc).

Prayer:

Dear Lord,
Help me to trust you through this uncertainty. Take my fears and my anxieties. Protect my family and those on the front lines fighting this virus. Bring them peace and comfort knowing you’re in control. Heal those that have gotten sick. Comfort them and their families. Help me today, and everyday, to shine your light in this darkness. Give me hope for tomorrow.
Amen.

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